So you see my daughter or someone just like her-----PLEASE use the moment to educate your children on exactly what special needs means. Someone who has special needs has NEEDS! So often I hear "special needs" but I don't see that it's understood what those needs are.
My daughter needs friends. She needs good role models. She needs to be loved and accepted the way she is. She needs flexibility in the people dealing with her. She needs to be held accountable. She needs compassion. She needs forgiveness. She needs the other person to be the better person, because she is not capable of this. She needs someone to take her hand and show her the way, and give her a smile.
Please feel free to USE her and children like her to teach your children. I can't emphasize this enough. So often we teach our kids not to stare, not to point, to stay quiet, to be polite.....but we forget about life's lessons. Kids are naturally curious. And most kids know nothing about DS and other conditions that cause special needs. I've heard from children...."she looks scary", and "is Downs Syndrome a disease?". "How come she acts the way she does?". "It's good that she can talk at her age" (she looks younger than 5). "How come she talks funny?" "Is she going to grow up someday?" And sadder..."Desirae germs" from some really nice children. I've seen a cousin roll her eyes at my daughter. I've seen cousins come to her birthday party and not even acknowledge her presence.
Worse than the pointing and staring, is the not understanding that she is a real person who feels very strongly, and loves very deeply. So USE her as a teaching tool. If you want, you can ask me anything. You can say hi to Desirae, she would love it. Mom's with kids who have special needs want your children to be better educated on this subject. Better education means fewer "Desirae germs", and more real SMILES!
Kids with DS have been my favorite to work with at school, they have so so much to offer! I have seen a student with DS be a role model to kids with no special needs. And the joy for life and quick wit in a school setting, although at times can be a bit much, it brings a spice to life!
ReplyDeleteShe sue does have her shining moments. She's the first in line to kiss boo boos! And academically, she is right there with her kindergarten peers. She knows and signs her alphabet. However there's the issue of boundaries and over-stimulation we deal with daily, and it's hard for other people to understand. I realize that I usually preach to the choir here.
ReplyDeleteI love the tips for parents with children. Many times we as parents just say, "DON'T STARE!" It is such a good point to answer all of those questions, which can be really hard.
ReplyDeleteTami, when you come for a visit we can answer lots of questions! You can look up chromosome charts and show the older two how DS is caused. There are traits that most children with DS have, and there are complications as well. A whole health/science lesson.
ReplyDeleteIt might be a neat idea to do some home study on special needs. Desirae's teacher was telling me how in this school (the special ed hub in our town) the kids are more accepting, and the whole school acts as a team with the special ed kids, and how they are treated by the other children. She compared it to the last school she taught at that didn't have a lot of special ed kids. I thought, what a neat idea! It's a gift added to the normies education. How many kids would want to be special ed teachers if they were never exposed to kids with special needs? The abortion rate with DS is over 95%(of those that know before hand from testing). How many could be prevented with some basic education and exposure?
Brenda,
ReplyDeleteI am shocked and so incredibly saddened by the abortion rate. I am really having a hard time wrapping my head around that.
I would love more info. for the kiddos. We have talked a lot about DS, from our meeting with Desi when she was just a toddler. Also, I always share about Wade. What a gift he was to our family.